Even God Had Bad Parenting Days - by Alicia Jo Rabins (Hardcover)

Product Description

Book Synopsis

"A deeply relatable, comforting guide for anyone who ever feels overwhelmed by parenthood . . . does not shy away from matters like the author's postpartum depression, loneliness, and financial strain. This authenticity sets Even God Had Bad Parenting Days apart from other parenting books."
--Leah Grisham, The Jewish Book Council


"Heartfelt, funny, and poignant" --The Jewish Review


"A multidimensional work of meditation and love" --Mikhal Wiener, Lilith


New parents get overwhelmed, regularly pushed to their limits and confused by contradictory feelings of elation and near-despair.
To soothe the frazzled and lift their spirits, writer and Bible scholar Alicia Jo Rabins has created "Even God Had Bad Parenting Days: ancient Jewish wisdom for new parents." Humorous, self-reflective, and comforting, Rabins' musings on both heartening and cringe-worthy biblical examples of parenting can help any caregiver see beyond the detritus of day-to-day living with young children and recapture a sense of wonder at the process of raising small humans.
Parents do worry about their failed attempts to be perfect, and these short, personal essays can lead them to new perspectives and even to embrace a vital concept that English psychologist and pediatrician D.W. Winnicott called "the good enough parent." The supportive and inspirational writings of this gentle parenting book can help any soul embarked upon this wild, sacred work recognize the wisdom of poet Norman Fischer's advice that "the only transcendence is fully embracing the ups and downs."
This collection draws on Alicia Jo Rabins' years of experience as a writer, Bible scholar, and feminist Jewish educator, and is based on her popular series of articles on parenting for Kveller.

Review Quotes

"Warm, witty, and wise, Alicia Jo Rabins offers essential
advice to parents. Her interpretation of ancient stories suffuses family
struggles--both mundane and profound--with beauty and wonder." --Vanessa Hua,
author of Forbidden City.

"Alicia Jo Rabins has given parents a gift of insight,
solace, solidarity, and care in this exquisite volume of spiritual nourishment.
This book is a blessing for anyone in the trenches of life with littles." --Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg, author of Nurture the Wow and On
Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World.
Do you ever have days when you feel like the least orga-nized
par-ent at drop-off? When you're cer-tain that if you hear the word ​"why"
from your tod-dler one more time you'll scream? When you just want to dis-ap-pear
into a dark, qui-et room and hide from the chaos hap-pen-ing in your home?
Or even con-sid-er whether hav-ing kids was a good idea?These are the sorts of ques-tions that Ali-cia Jo Rabins
asks and answers in her new book, Even God Had Bad Par-ent-ing Days, while
using Jew-ish wis-dom -- gleaned from the Torah, midrashim, Tal-mud, and oth-er
ancient texts -- to explore the not-so-Insta-gram-wor-thy ele-ments of twen-ty-first
cen-tu-ry par-ent-ing. An accom-plished artist, per-former, writer, and Torah
teacher, Rabins has craft-ed a deeply relat-able, com-fort-ing guide for
any-one who ever feels over-whelmed by par-ent-hood. Writ-ing of the High Hol-i-day
songs that so often paint God as the ulti-mate patient and lov-ing par-ent-fig-ure,
she says, ​"I con-fess that this idea of act-ing with infi-nite com-pas-sion
feels firm-ly beyond my reach. And that's why, from a parent's per-spec-tive,
I actu-al-ly find it com-fort-ing to remem-ber that God -- as described in
the Torah -- is impa-tient, imper-fect, and some-times down-right pis-sy," such
as when Korah is jeal-ous of Moses and Aaron's lead-er-ship roles. ​"Does
God calm-ly say, ​'Tell me more about what you're feel-ing'? No, God does
not. Instead God opens up a giant hole in the ground" that swal-lows him
whole. The point, of course, is not to advo-cate for crap-py par-ent-ing, but
to help par-ents and care-givers feel less alone in moments when rais-ing
a child is hard and patience wears thin.One of the book's strengths is that it is orga-nized into
short, the-mat-ic chap-ters -- most of them only three or four pages long -- that
are quick reads, acces-si-ble to even the most sleep-deprived, time-strapped
par-ent. Rabins cou-ples her own tri-umphs and chal-lenges with Jew-ish teach-ings,
a cre-ative deci-sion that pro-vides com-fort with-out com-ing across as
patron-iz-ing or false-ly opti-mistic. For instance, Even God Had Bad Parenting Days does
not shy away from mat-ters like the author's post-par-tum depres-sion, lone-li-ness,
and finan-cial strain. This authen-tic-i-ty sets Even God Had Bad Parenting Days apart from
oth-er par-ent-ing books. It reads as though it has been writ-ten by an expe-ri-enced
mom friend who's seen it all, who lis-tens with-out judg-ment, and who always
offers the best response to life's dif-fi-cul-ties -- even if that response is
just to rub your back and say she under-stands. Par-ent-ing can feel like
a lone-ly, stress-ful endeav-or, but Even God Had Bad Parenting Days will make any par-ent
or care-giv-er feel seen, under-stood, and more inti-mate-ly con-nect-ed to Jew-ish
teachings. --Leah Grisham, The Jewish Book Council